20 March 2017

Pain… it comes and goes in waves. Sometimes I am just living life and a massive wave will just crash into me. Drowning me, making me unable to breath. Panting for the air, tears fill my eyes. I don’t want to feel like this.

 

utterly alone………

I hate it even more that I let it get to me! I want to be free and happy. I want it to just drift off me like it was easy and sweat droplets glistening off your skin. Yes the workout was hard, but the sweat more on and off. I want that to be my emotions.

I don’t miss you. I miss a person being there though. Feeling like someone cares. I hate that the last 8 years was a lie.

I hate that you were my number one and I don’t trust you now.

You have taken so much from me! And I want to pretend I am fine, but I am not.

I am not fine!!

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